Usually this time of year is busy for everyone, but there’s been some extra hustle and bustle for us. I’ve posted about our first adoption event, but haven’t found the time to put down into words anything that’s happened since then. The young man we met back in August (we’ll call him “D”) was on our mind and in our hearts that we felt we couldn’t ignore it, we were being led to see where this goes…As with any other child in foster care, we learned that “D” has had some struggles in his short life – but nothing that we didn’t think we could handle.
After lots of consideration we made the decision to move forward. It seemed to take forever, everything was moving at a painfully slow snail’s pace. Finally, we get word that his social worker would like to interview with us! Now, “D” is from the western part of the state, a good 4.5 hours away so the interview was via Skype. Neither of us enjoy getting pictures taken so we certainly don’t like the idea of video chatting but if this is what it takes, that’s what we do. So we ‘skyped’ with his social worker, his recruiter, administrator, supervisors, the whole team. They had several questions for us and we were able to ask questions as well. In fact, our social worker made sure to tell us that nothing was off-limits, she suggested we ask anything we wanted to know – I mean, you need to know what you’d be getting into before making a life-altering decision, right?
We felt like the interview went well but several weeks went by without a word. There was another family being interviewed as well so we were getting anxious. The same recruiter that facilitated the the first event we attended had organized another Thanksgiving event the weekend before the holiday and we were invited to attend – we were told “D” would be there. My initial thought was ‘will the other family be there as well because that could be awkward’ but of course I never actually asked that question. We decided we really wanted to see him again so we drove several hours back to Charlotte for the event.
As soon as we got there a cute little boy walked up and introduced himself to us, let’s call him “N”. He immediately started talking about what he liked to do, liked the eat, he was making a point to sell himself. As I came back from the bathroom a girl (“B”) asked me to come sit and talk with her and well, it’s not like I’m going to say no. She was quite funny. Although we were there to see “D” in particular, that doesn’t mean we couldn’t pay attention to any of the other kids and these really are great kids. The event included a dinner and afterwards some of the kids stood up to speak about how thankful they were to have us there to spend time with, etc. Oh, to hear these kids talk so eloquently about strangers spending a few hours just talking, playing games and sharing a meal with them… My husband felt the urge to stand up and speak too. He’s not the most articulate guy, but he spoke from the heart and I just broke down into tears, along with a few of the other potential parents.
After these events the kids usually get goodie bags; “N” had made a monkey out of play dough. He came over to give it to me. I knew if I took that play dough I would be making a commitment that I couldn’t keep and I didn’t want to break his little heart. I explained that he was very sweet but I couldn’t take his play dough. His response, “but I don’t know when I will get to see you again and if you don’t pick me then I may never see you again”. Oh. my. God. How on earth do you respond to something like that? He then came over and gave both of us a hug. He was breaking my heart! Then, as we were leaving, “B” said “so, you guys wanna take me home?”. Seriously, if they’d let me I would’ve taken all three of them right then & there.
Fast forward another week or so…I’m at work and I get a call from our social worker – they’ve made a decision on a family for “D”… and they picked us! I was so shocked and immediately overwhelmed with emotion that I nearly dropped the phone. So what now, what happens next? Well, the adoption committee won’t meet again until January so we have to wait some more. But… yes, there’s a but… “D” requested to spend Christmas with us and would we be okay with that. YES!! Of course we would! So we still have to work out the logistics and it’ll only be for a few days, but that’s okay. We are beyond excited, I have to keep pinching myself because it’s all so surreal. We’ve known for several days now, but I don’t think it’s truly sunk in yet. I’ve caught myself driving to work and it hits me – I’m going to be a mom! And of a teenager! Oh boy…